all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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