just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Randomize
