Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I think i peed on brittanys purse
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
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