I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
