yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
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