Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
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