It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
