Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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