I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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