But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Randomize
