just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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