That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize