Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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