as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
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