If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
