Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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