Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
