Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize