I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Randomize
