chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
