is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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