Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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