drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Randomize
