Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
