suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
