hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
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