at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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