he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
