that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
That accounts for only three of the penises
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Randomize
