My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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