I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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