Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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