I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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