are you still at the devil's house?
So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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