id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Randomize
