ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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