I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize