ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
