4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
try to milk me bitch
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