is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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