If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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