All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize
