Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
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