His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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