the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
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