Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
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