So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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