I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I just want nice things and good sex
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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