how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
