Whats the glycemic index on semen?
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
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